RAPTORS AND WARRIORS IN DRAKE JERSEY BAN BIDDING WAR
RAPTORS AND WARRIORS IN “DRAKE JERSEY BAN” BIDDING WAR 5AM IN TORONTO, ON – It is known the world over that pop-rap artist Aubrey Graham, also known as Drake, is the number one jinx when it comes to his favorite sports teams. Whether it be the Alabama Crimson Tide, Kentucky Wildcats, Toronto Maple Leafs, Serena […]
SAUERKRAUT SAUL THREATENS LAWSUIT OVER SATCHEL/PURSE FIASCO
PITTSBURGH, PA – Although we are currently living in a completely divided country at the moment, I think we can all agree that gender equality is very important in the world of sports and entertainment. One thing is for certain, and that’s the fact that Sauerkraut Saul, one of the original pierogies to run in […]
SJ: One NHL Apology Away From Breaking Record
SAN JOSE, CA – Last night San Jose Sharks forward Timo Meier was as handy as a Swiss Army Knife when he single handedly assisted on the Sharks controversial game winning overtime goal handing the Sharks a 2-1 series lead, in what some are calling “hands down” the most interesting series in the Conference Finals. […]
Student Struggles With Roommate Who Prefers Hunt’s Ketchup
Athens, OH — Having completed his freshman year in an out-of-state university, Pittsburgh-native Nick Watson, 19, contemplates transferring schools after living with a roommate who preferred Hunt’s over Heinz Ketchup. Watson, who is now indebted with thousands of dollars in student loans, did not expect to be stuck with a 2nd-rate ketchup. “What the f&*% […]
Pirates Fans React With Sympathy to UNC’s Painful Loss
PITTSBURGH, PA— Yinzers all over the Steel City flinched last night when Villanova’s Kris Jenkins drained a last second three-pointer to defeat the North Carolina Tarheels for the NCAA Men’s Basketball Championship. “Man, I feel for them Tar Heel fans,” said Doug “Sudsy” Flanders of Greenfield. “[CBS] showed their crying faces and all I saw […]
